How to Make a Metal Pipe

by F0EH4MMER

First, I'll share with you the basics, then, I will tell you how to get more of a "WOW" effect from both yourself as well as others.

Most of what I'm referring to can be found at your local smoking accessories store, as I haven't found any website that sells the parts themselves. Now, depending on what you want your "Pretty Meter" to show, the parts range from 25 cents to 3 to 4 dollars. I'll be describing the most basic cheapest parts first, then get into the prettier shit.

If you'd like to know how my first experience went, its a cool story, I'll post it at the bottom.

BASICS: Note that some pieces may require additions in order to be fitted to each other. Just experiment! If you still can't figure it out, ask the clerk!

1) He/She might know and be a prick.

2) He/She might not know and be a prick.

or my personal favorite (and experience)

3) He/She might know, and actually help you build you an awesome pipe.

I HIGHLY RECOMMEND USING RUBBER SEALS (Little Black Rubber Rings) IN BETWEEN EVERY SINGLE PIECE YOU USE TO MAKE YOUR PIPE!!! YOU WANT IT TO BE AIRTIGHT!!!

Now lets secrete some elbow grease.

Bowls: Seeing as how this is mainly about smoking the ol' "Mary Jane" (However, it can be tobacco or catnip {gross...} also) I'll start off with bowls. Depending on the purpose of this pipe, it can have several sizes, as well as different materials (steel, brass, or wood {NEVER BUY ALUMINIUM OR PLASTIC!!!});

a) Small - generally for personal use, though, goes reasonably well with a very small group, 1 to 5 people, 6 if its a shallow drag group.

b) Medium - Haven't found any as of yet...

b) Large - being generally for a small/medium group of maybe 8-12 people (untested, maybe more maybe less).

c) Holy Shit... - generally some home made contraption that uses a "Dutch Oven" as a bowl, possibly through drilling and fitting tubes... Generally for the insane parties of about 20+ people... Note: This, also, is untested, mainly because I don't know that many people. =P

Now, I personally haven't tried them, but I've heard that any kind of smoking you are doing, whether it be tobacco or marijuana just tastes better out of a wooden bowl, as opposed to metal. Some people say that the metal gives the smoke a unique taste that some people like (I'm one of them). Remember that everyone is different in their likes and dislikes, don't fight, just smoke and roll with it.

Also Note: Most of the metal bowls are "Lid" compatible, meaning that you can screw an airtight lid on and keep a bowl fresher, as well as safe and sound until its ready to be smoked. OR! You can get a smokeless lid, which is pretty much a lid with a small hole in the middle. This will make your metal pipe a stealth, meaning you won't get a lot of smoke and odor. Also note that the pipe may be smokeless, but you are not, if you are wanting your "pleasures" to stay hidden, open a window and exhale out the window.

Elbows - This is the piece that generally connects the bowl to the stem. These usually come in to types:

a) Flat-Elbows - What they lack in appearance they make up for in stability. They make your pipe less likely to tip over when setting down. Also, the way you put this together, you can lay it with the mouthpiece resting on the table, with the bowl facing a 45 angle back toward the mouthpiece, or you can switch the bowl with the stem (screw the stem into the hole where the bowl WAS, and the bowl into the stem hole) and have both the mouthpiece and the bowl are in a V shape balancing on the elbow. (interlinking these is currently untested)

b) Round-Elbows - These have little to no stability alone. However, because of the design, you can link several of these babies together to make a very unique spiral effect.

Stems - OK, let me first say that you have to make the stems from scratch, piece by piece. Now if you aren't a very creative person, have your friend do it =P and if you are, please proceed.

There are two ways to make them, as follows:

Chambered - A chamber is basically 2 replacement bowls connected by a fatter tube or several interlinked tubes (using other various pieces) depending on how long you want your pipe stem to be, from lip burner to churchwarden {pipe styles, check them out}). These may look strange, but they CAN look awesome, and smoke a cooler smoke if you do it right.

Non-Chambered - These pieces are generally just plumbing nipples, the same diameter from end to end.

Now for the Mouthpiece! - All of this is about preference, find the one that fits the most comfortably in your lips (I know it sounds sick, but its the truth, just exhale your ego and inhale the smoke through a comfortable mouthpiece because, most people won't want to keep smoking your pipe if it hurts the lips or is difficult to hit it.

That's it!

If you want to see some pics of my first pipe that I've christened the "Bag-Pipe" (due to the back in which I transport it) email me, I'll send you a pic, when I take one... LOL!

IF YOU AREN'T INTO HEARING MY STORY, THEN SKIP THIS NEXT PART!

MY STORY: When I first went in to do this, I'd NEVER owned my own pipe, and I figured, if I'm going to buy one, I may as well get one I like, and one that doesn't hurt the pockets. I went in and I was the only one there besides the clerk, we both said our hellos and I started browsing. After about 10 minutes of browsing, I'd found nothing that caught my eye. I saw CC Glass pipes and bubblers: $25-$40! Water-Pipes (Bongs, if you are in the USA, use the name WATER PIPES or you can get kicked out!) were upwards of $80-$300!

I was having a good day, so I asked the clerk if he had anything cool for cheap. That's when he pulled out this insane twisty metal contraption that looked like a miniature Hookah. This thing was kick ass, and I told him so! When he told me made it, I was kinda sceptical, you know like "Yeah, sure man!" and "You're kiddin' right?". He just smiled and led me to a glass cabinet that I'd passed by (Because I wasn't originally looking for metal pipes).

On further inspection, I noticed a crapload of small replacement parts. Bowls. Tubes. Rubber Seals. COOL!

It took me and the clerk an AMAZING fucking 4 hours straight of frankenstiening until the pipe was finished and about 15 minutes until the store closed... LOL! The clerk, a 22 year old stoner (nice guy!) helped me the whole time! When all was done, I ended up with a 14" long Gandalf style pipe with a wooden bowl as a carb. In total, about 15 different pieces were used. He gave me an employee discount on everything, and threw in a Stealth Toker (It looks like a stealth lidded large silver bowl with a black rubber mouthpiece), a crapload of steel screens, and also a larger sized bowl with a stealth lid for FREE!!! In the end the total cost of the pipe came to be about $15 and what I actually got would have cost me about $25 if the guy wasn't cool! He even introduced me to a "Slib" which is a mix of tobacco and marijuana. He told me his friends always give him shit, but it actually tastes DAMN good! (Can give you a nicotine high as well as a slight pot buzz, also good if you don't like the taste of tobacco).

He said that not many people need bongs for tobacco, so business is usually slow, so he just tinkered with his own metal pipe creations, its a really neat process that I think more should indulge in!

If you are not wanting a peace pipe (long as hell) you can spend at most 10 dollars. ALL YA GOTZ TA DO IS FRANKENZTIEN!!!